


The Dating Habits of Useless Lesbians

by Tamoline



Series: The Life and Loves of a Cape Wrangler [2]
Category: Parahumans Series - Wildbow
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-09-30 14:02:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17225387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tamoline/pseuds/Tamoline
Summary: Three years after Taylor, Sophia and Madison accidentally formed a team after a class assignment gone bad, things are going well. They're starting to get real recognition, along with at least some non-CapeFunder sponsorship and Madison is even managing to more or less balance college at the same time. Now if only she had some time to herself and Sophia would stop acting so weird, things would be perfect. Wouldn't they?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you very much to [StabbyUnicorn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stabbyunicorn/pseuds/stabbyunicorn) for both the original fic and for helping me flesh out the idea behind this fic, and to [Kithri](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kithri/pseuds/Kithri) for betaing.

Madison was gently tugged from sleep by the smell of frying bacon. She peered at the clock. 7am. Ugh. Way too early to be up. But, on the other hand, if Taylor was making breakfast — cooked even — for once… Assuming there was any left by the time she’d dragged herself out of bed, she’d definitely have to thank her.  
  
And it wasn’t like there wasn’t always something that needed to be done these days.  
  
Then she heard the front door to the apartment open and close. “You realise it doesn’t count as a win if you use your powers to cheat,” Taylor said in a very irritated tone of voice, then, “Oh.”  
  
Suddenly, Madison wasn’t sleepy at all. If Sophia was cooking unprompted, something was very, very wrong. She hopped out of bed, pulled on her dressing gown and then popped her head out past her partition’s curtain. Taylor, still flushed and sweaty from the morning’s run, was staring at Sophia as she stood, spatula in hand, over a frying pan.  
  
Huh. Madison peered cautiously around, but she couldn’t immediately identify what trick Sophia was pulling.  
  
“I’ll let you figure out what’s going on,” Taylor murmured, pushing past Madison in the direction of the shower.  
  
Sophia twisted around to scowl at Madison. “Surprised to see you up so early, Maddy. Figures that it would be the smell of food.”  
  
“Well it’s certainly not your sweet nature,” Madison fired back, and then, “Um, you might want to keep an eye on that,” as black smoke started to rise from the pan.  
  
Sophia swore and yanked it off the heat. “You can eat that lot, if you want.”  
  
Madison sighed and approached the pan. Oh, the bacon was only a little black. That was fine, she kind of liked it crunchy. “Do you want some help with the rest of that?” she offered.  
  
“No!” Sophia snapped, snatching the pan away as soon as Madison had offloaded its current contents. “I can handle it,” she continued more calmly.  
  
“Suit yourself.” Madison propped herself up on the counter and nibbled on a rasher of bacon.  
  
Yup, good. She could get used to this. Pity it was probably a freak occurrence that would only happen once every seven years or something.  
  
“Don’t you have something else to be doing?” Sophia asked as she started up the next pan load.  
  
Madison considered, and then shrugged. “Nope. Good here. Wasn’t even supposed to be up yet.”  
  
Sophia glowered at the frying pan, but subsided into silence.  
  
“Hey Madison. Worked out what’s happening yet?” Taylor asked, towelling off her hair as she emerged from the bathroom.  
  
“Well, it tastes good and I haven’t needed to run for the bathroom yet, so there probably isn’t some ‘secret sauce’,” Madison said, considering. “Frankly, I have to start wondering if we’re dealing with a master or possibly the worst ever performance by a stranger.”  
  
By the end of that, Sophia was scowling so hard at the pan it was a wonder that it hadn’t spontaneously caught fire. She scooped out half the contents onto a plate, which she slammed down onto the table with extremely ill grace. “Here, Taylor,” she said. “Enjoy.”  
  
Taylor raised her eyebrows. “Thanks?” She approached the table, sat down and tucked in, cautiously at first, but with increasing enthusiasm . “Mmm. Thanks,” she said again, more sincerely.  
  
Sophia visibly relaxed as she filled up her own plate and, okay, maybe Madison had been a little hard on her. It was a nice gesture, even if she wasn’t sure what had prompted it. “Yeah, thanks, Sophia. This is really”— don’t say sweet, don’t say sweet — “thoughtful.”  
  
Sophia ignored her and sat down opposite Taylor. Madison shrugged and joined them. Sophia kept sneaking glances at Taylor, as if she were expecting something to happen, and Madison could see Taylor slowly becoming more and more tense.  
  
It probably wouldn’t become a thing — she’d like to think that they’d moved past that over the last three and a half years — but it didn’t mean it couldn’t get awkward. As if to illustrate the point, a fly buzzed loudly somewhere nearby; an agitated, ominous sound. It was joined by another, and another, and Madison decided that was her cue to intervene.  
  
“So,” she said. “I know I’ve been through this before, but is everyone clear on what’s going to happen at the opening tomorrow? I’m sure I don’t need to emphasise how big this is — the first place on the Boardwalk that’s hired us and all.” She deliberately went for a note of over-enthusiasm, and was rewarded with a slight smile from Taylor at least. Sophia didn’t seem impressed in the slightest. Then again, Madison still had no idea what was up with her.  
  
“Yes,” Taylor said and then added, only slightly mockingly. “You’ve gone through this before. Many times. Would you like me to do the reenactment with bugs again, just so you’re satisfied?”  
  
“Oh, yes please,” Madison said, clapping her hands before regretting that somewhat. There was definitely such a thing as over-egging the pudding. “Just, um, not on the table please. And do the voices. You do the best voices.”  
  
Taylor was giving one of her full-on dorky grins by this point. More cockroaches than Madison was really comfortable knowing lived in the local area collected themselves into the semblance of speakers and an audience.  
  
“Ladies and gentlebugs,” Taylor said in a comically deepened voice as one of the speaker cockroaches chirped. “We are gathered here to celebrate the opening of Insectopia…”  
  
Sophia’s chair screeched as she stood up suddenly. “I don’t need to listen to you two being geeks all day,” she said. “Later, nerds.” She walked stiffly out of the apartment, leaving half her plate unfinished.  
  
Madison and Taylor exchanged looks.  
  
“Should I...?” Taylor asked,  
  
Madison shook her head. “I’ll touch bases later, earn my pay as professional cape wrangler.”  
  
Taylor nodded slowly, but still looked troubled. “Okay,” she said, then returned to her speaker’s voice. “We have assembled here to celebrate the opening of this shop, which has the choicest garbage in all of Brockton Bay…”

* * *

  
  
“And that’s the latest drama with my roommates,” Madison said, finishing her tale, carefully edited to remove any reference to any cape shenanigans.  
  
Meg leaned back and smiled, curls gently bouncing in her black hair. “I don’t know. That sounds almost sweet.” Her tone turned slightly ironic. “Especially when you consider what else you’ve complained about Sophia getting up to.”  
  
“She isn’t as bad as I probably make her sound,” Madison said, feeling a little defensive. “It’s just that you only get to hear the highlights of living with her.”  
  
“Hey, no judgment here,” Meg said, then smirked. “Personally I still kinda wish that someone had gotten footage of the cooking oil incident.”  
  
“Thankfully for my dignity, no one did,” Madison said, resolving once again never to ask Taylor, just in case she had gotten that on bug cam. What Madison didn’t know could never be wormed out of her. She fiddled with her highlighter. “Thanks for allowing me to stress about this to you, especially when we’re supposed to be studying for a test.”  
  
Meg moved her hand over Madison’s, gently stilling it. “It’s no problem, really. It’s probably best to get it out of the way first, anyway. Besides, it isn’t as though you haven’t allowed me to complain about my bad dates before.”  
  
“Which reminds me, I haven’t heard about any of them for a while.” Madison made an exaggeratedly shocked face. “Does that mean you’ve actually had some luck there?”  
  
“Ha. No, I’ve just decided to put the whole going on dates with random people on pause for a while. Maybe find someone I already like before I try again.”  
  
Madison couldn’t help feeling somewhat relieved. Meg was one of the few friends she really had managed to find the time to hang around with at college, and while she’d of course be happy if Meg found someone, it’d really suck if Madison ended up dumped in the new significant other bliss period.  
  
Meg twined one of her curls around a finger as she looked at Madison. “How about you?”  
  
“Like I have time,” Madison snorted. “Between college, my business and looking after my friends, no chance.”  
  
“What about Taylor?” Meg asked, giving Madison a cautious look. “She seems like a sweetheart.”  
  
For a moment, just the thought of Taylor liking her made it difficult to breathe, her heart racing and not in a good way. She couldn’t imagine what that would do to the group’s carefully balanced dynamic. Then she reassured herself that of course Taylor would never like her, not like that. Taylor had eventually forgiven her, forgiven both of them for what they had done to her, but it was a far leap from that to…  
  
“Nah,” she said, doing her best to play her thoughts off as a joke. “That’s really not the kind of relationship we have. Besides, do I really need to add to the level of chaos in our household?”  
  
Meg looked amused, as well as a little of something else, a slight softness that Madison couldn’t quite identify. “Well,” she said. “Before we actually get down to revising, I think I’m going to have to float the suggestion that you make at least a little time for yourself sometime soon. You’re going to burn yourself out if you’re not careful.”  
  
“Ugh,” Madison said, letting her head slump down and hit the table with a thump. “No time.” She didn’t want to even think about all the work and college related stuff she had to deal with at the moment.  
  
Meg poked her in the ribs repeatedly, so that Madison laughed and flailed ineffectually at her. “I insist” she said firmly. “Maybe just an hour or so, where you get to relax and just not think of anything college, roommate or work related.” Finally ceasing her assault on Madison’s ribs, she gave her a small smile. “Maybe, I don’t know, I could take you out for coffee after this?”  
  
Madison raised her head and gave Meg her best grin, hoping it didn’t look too weary. “That sounds heavenly, but rain check?” Now that their team was attracting more serious attention, she had a couple of phone interviews she really had to hold after this. And that was even without thinking about the negotiations she was in the middle of…  
  
“I’ll hold you to that,” Meg said semi-seriously, then picked up her highlighter. “But if your time is so limited, I guess we better get to it. So, if you look at section 6.3…”

* * *

  
  
Madison, arms laden down with groceries, had pushed the door open and stepped through before she registered the darkened living area, lit only by the television, and what sounded like gentle snoring coming from the couch. She winced as the door thumped into the wall, but no-one seemed to stir. Quietly shutting the door, she crept into the kitchen to put everything away.  
  
It had been a hard last few days — and nights — for Sophia and Taylor. With the increase in attention from the media, and — the true mark of success for independent heroes — rumours of a small run of action figures, the Empire had seemingly decided that they hadn’t put enough pressure on Little Egypt for a while and stepped up their game. That, together with a few independent villains deciding that the time was ripe for making moves themselves, meant neither Sophia nor Taylor had managed to grab much opportunity for sleep the past few nights.  
  
And then she managed to get her first proper view of the situation on the couch and couldn’t help a vicious grin of pure evil from spreading across her face. Sophia was slumped more or less upright on the couch, her eyes closed and her mouth slightly open. Taylor, equally asleep, was curled up with her head on Sophia’s lap. The two of them looked utterly adorable.  
  
Sophia would absolutely hate this if she knew, and Madison was determined to make sure that she did. Along with Taylor, quite possibly Terry. Maybe Madison’s mother and father as well for good measure. She slipped her phone from out of her pocket and quietly snapped a photo. When her vision had recovered from the flash, Sophia was staring daggers at her, making a throat slitting motion with her free hand.  
  
Oh wow, this was even better. She took another photo, this time including Sophia’s snarl. She sent this one off to Meg, entitled ‘twu wuv’.  
  
Sophia’s expression was almost indescribable; incandescent rage mixed with a little bit of shock that Madison had dared do this to her. Madison was fairly sure that the only thing holding Sophia back from jumping her was that it would disturb Taylor and, okay, that thought did warm her cold shrivelled heart just a little. It was really nice to have the occasional bit of evidence that Sophia, beneath all the bluster, was capable of these softer little moments with her teammates. Not that she didn’t have own ways of showing affection, but they tended towards being… a bit more aggressive.  
  
“Is there anything I can get you?” she mouthed.  
  
Sophia frowned before retrieving her phone from a pocket. She typed in a word, then showed it to Madison: ‘Juice’. She thought for a moment, then added ‘chicken leg’ as well.  
  
Smiling, Madison retrieved both of those and handed them to her, which Sophia took with ill grace. Madison took a moment to study the two of them. There were clear rings under Taylor’s eyes as she gently snored and Sophia, despite being awake, wasn’t looking that much better.  
  
“Do you want a foot massage?” Madison mouthed. She might have had other things she needed to be doing, but looking after her capes was also part of her job. Maybe the most important part.  
  
Sophia looked torn but, after some brief consideration, gave a curt nod, as Madison had known she would. She knew Sophia’s weaknesses. Grabbing a cushion, Madison plopped herself down on it in front of the couch and let Sophia put a foot in her lap. She took her sock off, and started gently massaging her foot, feeling the tension start to bleed from it. Above her, she saw Sophia bite her lip as her eyes rolled up. There may have even been a hint of a slight moan.  
  
God, if Sophia was letting herself react so obviously she must have really needed this.  
  
Madison’s fingers and hand started to ache so she moved Sophia’s foot from her lap. Sophia made a slight noise of protest which was quickly stilled as Madison took her other foot into her lap and repeated the process. This time the effect was even more pronounced as Sophia arched her back.  
  
Taylor’s snores broke off mid-snort and she half raised her head from Sophia’s lap. “Wha-wha?” she mumbled.  
  
A look of sheer panic overtook Sophia’s face and she thrust at Taylor with the arm that had been pinioned beneath her, hard enough that Taylor half fell off the couch.  
  
Suddenly, Taylor didn’t look anywhere near as sleepy. Suddenly there was an ominous buzzing in the air.  
  
Crap.  
  
“Gotta go!” Sophia half shouted as she tried to jump to her feet, apparently forgetting that Madison still had hold of one of them. What Sophia actually managed to accomplish was falling over, burying Madison in the process. Sophia’s immediate reaction to the disaster was to turn misty.  
  
Okay, first things first.  
  
“Sophia!” she snapped, trying her best to sound commanding; trying to ignore that the buzzing got louder in response to her tone. “You need some sleep as well. If you can’t get it here, you have a perfectly good bed in your partition.” She knew that she sounded like her mother, and kind of hatred that, but when needs must…  
  
Sophia reformed, a sullen glower on her face, but to Madison’s relief, she followed the suggestion and headed off to her room. Taylor was left half-on, half-off the couch, looking confused and tense, face and tousled hair crawling with insects. Her hand gripped the pocket which held her extensible baton.  
  
“Hey, Taylor,” Madison said softly, calmingly. “Sophia just startled. She didn’t mean to dump you on the floor.”  
  
Taylor looked at her searchingly for a moment, then nodded and the buzzing subsided. “How did I- did I fall asleep on the couch?”  
  
“On top of Sophia, actually.” Madison couldn’t help smirking slightly.  
  
“That explains why I ended up on the floor, I guess.”  
  
“No, no, she let you do that,” Madison said, showing her the photographic evidence. “It was actually kind of” — she glanced around and lowered her voice — “sweet.”  
  
“Oh.” Taylor sounded surprised, but in a pleased kind of way, her cheeks slightly flushed. The sight sent a pang through Madison, the old guilt clawing at her all over again at the evidence that such a small gesture could mean so much, even after over three years of friendship.  
  
She dismissed the thought. Her feelings weren’t important at the moment. Taylor’s were.  
  
“Yeah, you ending up on the floor might have been my fault. I was giving her a foot massage, and you know how she gets about those.”  
  
Taylor burst out into a giggle and fully relaxed, stretching out into a yawn.  
  
“Come on, you,” Madison said, clapping her on the shoulder. “Sophia’s not the only one who needs to sleep. Better get to it before the next wave of trouble hits.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Thanks, Madison,” Stefan said as he and the rest of the study group cleared up the books and takeout containers littered around Meg’s dorm room. “Been good studying with you. Hope to do it again some time.”

“Thanks. It’s been great meeting you all,” Madison said quietly, ducking her head a little. She exchanged similar sentiments with a couple of the others before succumbing to the temptation to check out work email alerts that had been flashing throughout the study session. Apparently Kauket and Serqet had another battle during the day, with Recalescence and some of her minions from the looks of it. Ferric had been there too, and Madison couldn’t help frowning a little. Recalescence was bad enough against their team as it was; they didn’t need her picking up another cape and certainly not a tinker.

The request for an action report from the PRT was basically pro forma by this point, and she filed that in the appropriate folder. It might have been a legal requirement if they wanted to keep their independent hero status, but the bare minimum of detail required wasn’t that much and they had thirty days to file it, so she had a method where she preferred to write a bunch of them all at once. She still couldn’t help grinning a little at the emails from the Brockton News and WGPN-LP — any footage at all from cape fights was rare, and now that the team had come to local attention, she’d been slowly managing to drive the prices for bug-cam photos up. Even if it did mean that she had to dicker pretty much each and every time.

Sooner or later she’d probably want to sign a contract for them, but she still felt too nervous to do that just yet. She was just a sophomore at college — what if she locked the team into a really stupid decision?

Somewhat less than great was the email from one of the local shops. Apparently one of the windows had been smashed during the fight, and Mr Luthra was offering them the chance to pay out of pocket rather than submit it to insurance. Madison sent back a quick email thanking him and saying that she’d get back to him tomorrow. Paying out of pocket would be better than the uptick in cape insurance if they were deemed to be at fault — not to mention the bad publicity if it was handled publicly — but one of the advantages of bug-cam was a good chance of having proof about who exactly did what.

She blinked and suddenly half an hour had passed, and the only person left in the room was Meg. She’d completely missed everyone else leaving. Ugh. She rubbed her eyes and smiled ruefully at Meg. “Sorry about spacing out like that,” she said.

Meg waved a hand in the air, far too magnanimous for her own good. “Don’t worry about it. Shana isn’t back yet and it’s actually kind of cool to see someone who has that much focus.” Her eyes flickered away from Madison’s and she shrugged a little embarrassedly. “It’s nice to know that someone’s got their life figured out.”

“It really doesn’t feel that way. Half the time it’s like I barely know what I’m doing, and half the rest of the time I’m definitely sure I don’t,” Madison said with more honesty than was perhaps wise. “Not that, um, you should really repeat that.” She made a face. “I can’t believe I just told you.” She was fairly sure she was blushing.

Meg hopped off her bed and settled down next to Madison on her dorm-mate’s bed. She quickly wrapped an arm around her and gave her a reassuring squeeze before shifting away to put some space between them. “Sorry,” she said. “You seemed like you needed the hug. And I’d have never have known that you weren’t completely confident if you hadn’t just told me.”

Okay, Madison was definitely sure that she was blushing now, but maybe it wasn’t so bad, not like this. Not when she could still feel Meg’s arm around her. “Well,” she said. “That’s certainly what I aim for. A lot of the people I deal with would eat me alive if I showed any weakness.”

“Ugh,” Meg said. “That sounds awful.”

“It’s probably not so bad if you’re not thrown in the deep end.”

Meg made a face. “Yeah, I’m really not convinced about that.”

“I’m sure you’ll be great at whatever you decide to go into. Look at how you’ve organised this study group.”

Meg fiddled with her hair, curling and uncurling it around a finger. “I’m thinking about changing my major,” she said quietly.

What about me? Madison wanted to ask, but managed to bite her lip instead. “Any idea what you want to do instead of business? Maybe thinking of getting seriously into art?”

Meg shook her head. “I really enjoy drawing and painting as a hobby, but I’m fairly sure that if I had to do it full time I’d burn out quickly. No, I’m thinking of something that’ll earn me far less money.” She sighed. “I want to go into academia. Pure math, no less.”

“And I take it the parental units would not approve?”

Meg gave Madison a sour expression. “I can hear them already. There’s no money in that kind of thing, not now. Maybe it was viable when we were young, but now, with Thinkers and Tinkers, everyone’s looking to them to make the new discoveries, not some low paid ‘professor’ at a university.” She looked down at her lap. “I know they’re right. I’ve seen the budgets that non cape related blue sky research gets these days. But,” she huffed a laugh, “Is it weird to say that it’s what I’ve dreamed of, since I was young? Even if it is amazingly impractical?”

Madison would miss seeing her in class. She really would. But… She shuffled over and wrapped an arm around her, hugging her fiercely. “Go for it,” she said quietly. “I mean, I’m fairly sure that my parents didn’t exactly have what I stumbled into in mind when they thought of my future. For one thing, they’d set their hearts on getting me out of state. But I love what I do, and I want that for you too. So… go for it, and I’ll back you all the way. Whether it’s helping you fill out forms, or going out for drinks while you complain about the unreasonableness of your parents. Whatever you need, I’m here for you, okay?”

She would be, even if it meant that she had to cut back on sleep to do everything that needed to be done.

She’d do it somehow.

Meg leaned her head on Madison’s shoulder. “Thanks, Madison. I really needed to hear that.”

* * *

Madison closed the top of her laptop, then yawned and stretched. Ugh, she didn’t want to stress anymore about whether the PRT representative had actually meant to sound as dismissive of Kauket and Serqet as he had. As far as she could tell, no one apart from some bottom-feeders on PHO were even talking about it at the moment and, unless and until it picked up steam online, there was really nothing she could do.

Which wouldn’t stop her worrying, of course.

She snorted to herself. Like the Protectorate were doing so much better, in any case.

Nope, nope, nope. She was going to get away from the computer and stop thinking about it, just like she’d promised herself before shutting it down. Time to see what she was going to cook for dinner.

She stopped as she passed Taylor’s partition and saw her there sprawled on her bed, propped up against the wall on a couple of pillows, reading a book clutched in one hand and nibbling on a chocolate held in the other.

“Hey,” Madison said. “Is that a Hebert in the wild I see, eating without being prompted?”

Taylor gave her a lazy wave with the chocolate hand. “Want to come in and share?”

“Sure,” Madison said, entering Taylor’s partition. It had changed a lot since Madison had first put it up. Sure, it still had the terrariums full of insects that Taylor found useful, but she’d actually put up some decorations since then — a couple of bookshelves full almost to the point of bursting, some photos, mostly of her and her father and various pictures of Serqet, or Serqet and Kauket, many drawn in crayon, that the team had been sent over the years.

And, apparently, a box of luxury chocolates that was open on her bedside cabinet.

“So,” she said after seating herself on Taylor’s bed and helping herself to a chocolate. “What’s the occasion?” It wasn’t one of the more obvious ones and nothing particularly bad had happened that she was aware of, not that Taylor was the type to eat her feelings in any case.

“An apology from Sophia, I think. For… you know, the stuff that happened back then.” Taylor made a face and put the chocolate back into the tray, half eaten. “I think that what she was going on about the other day. And that might be why I think she’s been letting me have the finishing blow against more villains than usual.” She slumped a little. “Is it wrong that I just want to leave all that in the past? I mean, we’ve all come so far, and it isn’t like you both haven’t apologised in your own ways in the past.”

Madison hovered, torn between wanting to approach Taylor, to try and help however she could, and wanting to leave her alone, to try and avoid the awkwardness that was sure to ensue. She settled for shifting uneasily. “I think you’re entitled to feel however you want to,” she said lamely.

“Yeah, I guess,” Taylor said, not seeming particularly satisfied. Madison’s stomach twisted as Taylor paused for a moment before toeing Madison gently in the ribs. “I’m sorry if I scared you the other day. You know, when Sophia shoved me off the couch whilst I was asleep.”

“You didn’t. Everyone has their thing. You have your bug thing. Sophia has her storming off thing. It’s all good.”

“Good. I guess I was just kind of worried that Sophia might think I wasn’t over stuff and that’s why she apologised, and then I worried that you might think that too.”

Oh wow. Madison really hoped that she didn’t look as uncomfortable as Taylor did. As uncomfortable as Madison felt.

“I’m glad you can talk about this with me,” she said, what she knew she should say, even though she really didn’t feel that way. “Um, so have you talked about this with Sophia?” she asked, praying that Taylor would answer in the negative.

Taylor aimed a look of disbelief in her direction. “No! Can you even imagine?”

Madison giggled in relief. “Yeah, I mean you’d probably get as far as ‘I want to talk about fee-’ and she’d already be out of the building.”

Taylor giggled with her, then sobered. She tugged a pillow out from under her and hugged it. “Is it silly that I sometimes worry that Sophia sees me just as the great and mighty Serqet and not as, you know, Taylor? Just like she once just saw me as…?”

Madison suppressed her first instinct, which was to answer glibly as Taylor obviously wanted her to, and did her best to think. “I get that. I’m still not exactly sure what my role is in the action movie of Sophia’s life. Comedy sidekick, I’d guess. But if it helps, I don’t think she does just see you that way. I mean, the all-seeing Serqet doesn’t exactly need to sleep on anyone’s shoulder, nor to have chocolates given to them.”

Taylor relaxed and threw the pillow at Madison’s head. “Nor to throw pillows at their comedy sidekicks?”

Madison narrowed her eyes at Taylor. “I see how it is. Well, obviously as the apartment’s designated comedy sidekick, maybe I should start extending that to my cooking. What hilarious mishaps could I make there?”

Taylor flailed at her, managing to clutch her arm. “Noooooo…… I take it all back!”

Madison relaxed into her. “Okay, okay, I’ll guess I’ll let you get away with it this time.” She caught sight of a book underneath the box of chocolates. “Been making notes for your book club?”

Taylor wriggled a little against her. “It’s not my book club.”

“I’m fairly sure that Serqet is the main attraction at the BBQ book club these days.”

Madison could feel Taylor making a face at her. “Anyway, the answer to your question is no. I was not making notes. Sophia asked to borrow the book a few days ago, and returned it when she thrust the chocolates at me. Apparently it was ‘fine’.”

Madison pushed herself up so she could look Taylor in the face. “Really?” she asked, grinning. “Sophia ‘Book clubs are for nerds’ Hess, actually asking for the book of the month?”

“Well, I’m not sure she’s actually going to turn up to the book club. But I wouldn’t complain.”

“Oh, how the mighty have fallen.” Madison sobered. “Want to help me cook tacos for her tonight? As a way of, you know, letting her know she’s appreciated.”

“The way to Sophia’s heart is through her stomach,” Taylor said wryly, then grinned at Madison. “But sure. Let’s do that thing.”

* * *

“And I don’t understand why Sophia is doing this! Doesn’t she understand that everything’s going well now?” Madison felt like she was looking wide-eyed and hysterical as she was finishing up her latest tale of woe, and from from the look on Meg’s face across the table, that feeling might not be far wrong.

Of course, looking at Meg reminded Madison of how selfish she was being. She’d finally cashed in that check for coffee, and what was she doing with it? Stressing about her house mates yet again. This surely wasn’t what Meg had in mind when she’d suggested this. And that was even without the added guilt of all the things Madison should doubtless have been doing instead.

“And… what was Sophia apologising for? I don’t think you ever really said.”

Madison froze. “Um. Things. Stuff.” She took a deep breath, then another. Maybe… Maybe Meg deserved to know what kind of a person Madison was. She hurried onwards before she could lose her nerve. “Back in the first year and a half of high school, Taylor was bullied by this crowd that Sophia and I used to be a part of. And by a part of, I mean that we were two of the three ringleaders.” Madison dropped her gaze to her coffee, unable to continue looking Meg in the face. She was so pretty, she really didn’t deserve this. “It got really bad at times. But then, through a series of weird and unlikely events that started with a class assignment, we bonded and realised that we could like each other?” If like was the right word. Sophia and Taylor had started working together because being a pair of independent heroes was way safer than working alone, and Madison… If she was being totally honest, back at the beginning she’d just leapt at the chance to work with some real life capes.

When Madison dared to glance up again Meg looked sceptical, like she knew that Madison was leaving whole volumes out of her explanation. Which, to be fair, she probably did. If there was an examination for deception, Madison would not be getting a passing grade right about now. But all she asked was, “And then you all just moved in together and became a co-dependent huddle?”

Madison made a face. “It’s not that bad. We’re just so all involved in our business-“

“Your secret business that you’ll only give the most vague of details about,” Meg interrupted.

Madison shrugged and tried to give her a smile. “Yeah, sorry about that again. It’s just so all bound up with NDAs and such that I really can’t give you any details, just in case.”

“But still,” Meg said remorselessly, “A former victim of bullying and two of her bullies start living together and go into business, and it’s only now that Sophia is apologising?”

Madison’s insides twisted. “She had apologised before, in her own way. And yes, before you ask, I have also apologised, and tried to make amends as best I could.”

“I wasn’t going to, actually. I mean, you spending so much time taking care of Taylor as well as Sophia does make a little more sense now,” Meg said bluntly.

Madison winced. “It’s not like that probably sounds. I honestly actually enjoy making sure everything’s going well. And Taylor’s such a sweetheart” — most of the time, she couldn’t help thinking — “that it really isn’t much of a chore. And even Sophia cares in her own way.”

“Well, just so long as you’re doing it because you want to do it, and not out of some guilt complex. I can’t imagine that’d be doing any of you any good. But maybe Sophia’s bringing this up now because she doesn’t feel it’s quite settled on her end?”

“Maybe,” Madison said, feeling a little calmer about the whole thing. “That would make sense.” And maybe Taylor could get some closure too, if she felt she needed some. But this really hadn’t been why she’d taken up Meg on her invitation for coffee. “I’m so sorry,” she said. “I really didn’t mean to make this all about me and my issues. Have you managed to talk to your adviser yet?”

It was Meg’s turn to look down. “Yeah. She thinks I might just about be able to change my major. But unless I want to take another year, it’s pretty much going to take up my timetable next semester. I’m not going to have time for anything else.” She didn’t need to say that she couldn’t afford an extra year of college, that the only reason she had been able to go in the first place was because she’d gotten a full ride.

“Oh, Meg,” Madison said, reaching over the table to rest her hand on Meg’s wrist. “What are you going to do?”

Meg licked her lips and swallowed before replying. “I don’t know. I probably shouldn’t. What if I burn out and am left with nothing? Not to mention my parents are probably right about the employment prospects.”

“But what do you want to do?”

Meg looked back up at her. “Between that kind of schedule and yours, any hope of us… hanging out would be lost. And I’d have to go AWOL from pretty much all the friends I’d made here as well.“

“I’ll still be here the semester after,” Madison said with a crooked grin. “As will anyone really worth your time.”

Meg twisted her hand around and gripped Madison’s. “Thank you,” she said a little tearfully. “I know I seem to saying that a lot recently, but yeah. I’m going to go for it.”

“Good,” Madison said, even as her heart twisted within her chest. She’d told herself that even if Meg was going to change majors, they’d still be able to see each other. But now they probably wouldn’t. Not for a semester at least. And who knew if Meg would even remember her after that?

It might not be high school anymore, but a semester was a long time.

Of course, that assumed that Meg would want to see her again in any case, after what Madison had revealed today.

“The whole situation with Taylor is a lot,” Meg said, echoing her thoughts. “I’m not sure how I feel about it yet” —how she felt about Madison yet, she didn’t need to say— “But… just a thought. Apologies, doing nice things for Taylor — all of that tracks with Sophia trying to make good. The chocolates though… Is there any chance Sophia’s trying to clear the board before asking her out?”

Oh no, Madison thought distantly, even as she could feel her cheeks draining of blood.

Oh no.

Not that.

Anything but that.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for skipping a week with the update. I got severely blocked on one particular sentence in the second scene and just stopped there for other a week. Thank you to Kittius for acting as a beta and a general sounding board, as well as specifically getting me past that line.

Taylor hit the floor as Madison entered the apartment, Sophia standing above her fallen form. For a moment Madison just stood there, watching, her stomach knotted. But then Sophia thrust her hand impatiently at Taylor, pulling her up when Taylor grabbed the offered appendage.

“Still not aggressive enough, Taylor,” she said. “You’ve got to play if you want to win.”She stepped away from Taylor and readied herself to fight again.

Taylor good-naturedly rolled her eyes and assumed a defensive stance. “I’ve never had a problem being aggressive when it counts.”

It was a familiar argument, as far as it went, but with Meg’s words still echoing in her head, she couldn’t help…

Taylor bodily tackled Sophia, ending up on top of her as they crashed to the ground. “Aggressive enough for you?” she asked cheerfully. “Think we should practise some ground work now?”

Madison squeaked and dropped the bag of groceries she was carrying. She flushed as Taylor turned to look at her inquiringly, slight red in her own cheeks.

It wasn’t what it looked like. It wasn’t. It was just..

She’d seen things like this before, dozens of time in fact. It didn’t mean anything. It was just another of Sophia’s perennial drills on personal combat readiness.

But still. “S-sorry,” Madison couldn’t help stammering. “I can come back later if you want?”

Taylor pushed herself up and Sophia belatedly turned to look at Madison. “That’s alright,” Taylor said. “Want some help putting stuff away?” Her mouth curled in a smirk. “Maybe you can take my place with Sophia.” She grabbed the bag before Madison managed to get her mind around _that_ , sauntering off towards the kitchen area.

That also wasn’t what it sounded like. For a start, while Madison could admit that Sophia was objectively attractive, she really wasn’t what Madison was looking for in a girlfriend, even if Madison didn’t spend far too much of her time taking care of her already. That rationalisation did nothing to ease the heat in her cheeks, though, and she couldn’t imagine what she looked like.

This was all ridiculous. There was nothing going on between her room mates. It was all pure supposition put into her head by Meg, who really should have known better given how much she had talked about them to her.

She couldn’t help note that Sophia was scowling slightly as she got to her feet and pivoted to face her.

“Come on then,” she said, raising her fists. “Let’s see how well you remember your lessons.”

Madison sighed, focussing on the subject at hand. “I don’t suppose I could give you my usual answer? That I have no intention of actually sticking around to face anyone who wants to get into a fight?”

Sophia curved her lips slightly, dispelling whatever frown had been there before. “Nice try, Maddy,” she said. “I’m a girl who’s blocked you in an alleyway. You’ve got to get past me to escape. How’re you going to do it?”

“I don’t appreciate being your human sacrifice,” she called to Taylor.

“I’ll owe you one,” Taylor said cheerfully from the kitchen area. “I’ll even do the prep for dinner tonight.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Madison muttered as she prepared to charge at Sophia, and to be put down hard at least once before Sophia would take pity on her.

* * *

 

Her right hip was still twinging when she sat down for dinner with the other two. She served some of the chicken tikka masala onto her plate accompanied by rice and some aloo gobi on the side. Nowhere near hot enough for Taylor, who was still giving her a slightly mournful look that they hadn’t gone with *her* suggestion. But Madison had been the one cooking, and in her opinion the kitchen was pretty much unusable for normal people food if she made Indian the way Taylor liked it, especially if Sophia was egging her on.

Which… Madison cast Sophia a narrow eyed look. There had been a suspicious lack of taunting from her direction regarding the meal plan. Sophia raised her eyebrows back at her as she spooned food into her mouth and Madison looked down.

There wasn’t any weirdness here. She was just imagining it.

“Anything wrong, Maddy?” Sophia asked. When Taylor looked at her, she shrugged. “What, you know she’d normally be talking, talking, talking by now.”

“Well, yes,” Taylor admitted. “But I hadn’t been planning on actually saying anything if she didn’t want to talk about it.”

Sophia raised an eyebrow challengingly. “Well maybe that’s the difference between us.”

“Maybe,” Taylor said, then looked over at Madison. “So, now that Sophia’s been quite so blunt — is there a problem?” She quirked a smile. “Or maybe it’s that *someone’s* weirdness is catching.”

Madison couldn’t help jumping a little at that. “N-no,” she stammered out. “Who? Me? Being weird? Never. It’s just… Had a lot of college work recently, and mid-terms are coming. You know how it goes.”

Sophia had stopped eating to glare at her. When she noticed Madison looking at her — with what expression Madison honestly didn’t know — she shovelled another mouthful of food in.

“Yeah, because none of this is weird at all,” Taylor murmured.

Madison wasn’t sure how much of the tension she was imagining, but she could feel it virtually crawling down her spine. She blurted out the first thing that came into her mind. “So, I heard you had an encounter today?”

Sophia snorted before continuing to eat. Taylor said, “I’m not sure I’d call it anything as impressive as that. Grue and his team, whatever he’s currently calling them”—definitely a complete lack of branding sense there, ever since the Undersiders had broken up— “decided to high tail it through our turf after having caused some trouble for the Empire.”

Taylor smiled slightly. “I can’t complain that Blitz didn’t realise how far she’d gone before getting a face full of hornets. I know she’s a Mover, but I’m not sure that even she thought she could move that quickly.”

Madison giggled, her worries evaporating, at least for the moment. It was times like this, being the person in the know, getting to hear, even see, these kind of cape dealings in detail… It made everything, everything else worthwhile. “If only you’d managed to get footage of that. Black and white and blotchy red all over.”

“Ha!” Sophia said. “Have to remember that for the next time she pokes her nose around here.”

“Were you alright?” Madison asked Sophia. “With the whole…” she waved her hands around in the air trying to vaguely indicate the darkness.

Sophia scowled. “Wasn’t much I could do, with Grue spraying his shit everywhere.”

Taylor reached over the table towards her, then let her hand rest just shy of Sophia’s. “Actually, she managed to do the whole hero thing really well.” Her expression turned slightly stony. “Grue unsurprisingly wasn’t concerned with the collateral damage his darkness would cause, either from the other villains chasing them, or from the results of suddenly depriving streets full of people of vision. Sophia did a good job of getting people out of harm’s way and giving a couple of people first aid.”

“I know he’s not one of the big bads, but if he uses us like that again, we’re going to have to go make an example of him. He can’t be starting shit around here like that.”

“Agreed,” Taylor said. “Though if he didn’t have that Tinker of theirs, it’d make keeping up with them a lot easier.

“Still,” Sophia said. “We got a few good licks on some Empire goons when the darkness started dispersing. Even got some footage.”

“Yeah?” Madison asked leaning forwards. “Let’s see it.”

* * *

“And… here… we… go!” Madison murmured to herself, heart beating ridiculously quickly, as she sent an email full of contact details to herself from Meg’s old, battered laptop. She then quickly deleted it from sent mail before returning the browser to the tab Meg had left it on and scooted back over to her seat. Picking up the text book she’d been revising from, she forced herself to concentrate on the words, telling herself to calm down, to calm down.

There was no way Meg would realise anything was up, not if Madison kept her cool.

Everything would be fine.

“I’ve never realised you found statistics so thrilling. Your cheeks are positively flushed,” Meg said cheerily as she returned unseen from the coffee shop restroom, causing Madison to jump far more violently than her words really warranted. “Or… maybe I should get you cut off from the coffee instead.”

Madison immediately placed her hand protectively over her mug. “My precious,” she hissed. “I don’t think you can fairly expect me to look all these equations without some serious chemical aid.”

Meg looked up and down her with some amusement. “Judging by how high you just went, I really think you might have had enough.”

“It wasn’t that,” Madison objected. “It was just that… that… you surprised me. With your quiet, catlike ways,” she finished lamely.

Well done Madison, she told herself. If she didn’t suspect something before, she undoubtedly does now.

But Meg just raised an eyebrow and said, “If you want any more coffee, you’re going to have to pass the hand test.

Madison stuck her hand out, and when it barely trembled, she stuck her tongue out at Meg. “Satisfied, oh cruel taskmistress?”

“Hmmm… I guess,” Meg said quasi-reluctantly, before settling down and nudging Madison in the ribs. “But just know I’ll be keeping my eye on you.”

“I’m trembling in my shoes,” Madison said sardonically.

“So, how’s it going?” Meg asked.

Madison groaned and let the book flop down onto her face. “It feels like my brains are about to dribble out of my ears. I swear the letters and signs are swapping places when I’m not looking at them.”

Meg lifted her chair up and settled it next to Madison’s, so close that Madison’s side tingled with the heat she could practically feel radiating from Meg. “Come on, it can’t be that bad. Show me what you’re having a problem with.”

And it went like that for a few hours. Meg helping Madison with Statistics, Madison helping Meg with Marketing and them both swearing vengeance on the obtuse professor who taught History of Economics, which they’d both had the misfortune of thinking that it sounded interesting from the description. (“Obviously a triumph of advertising over substance,” Madison grumbled.)

But as nice as it was, working side by side with Meg like this, only occasionally breaking to answer business emails, Madison couldn’t help the slight twisting in her guts, the melancholy that returned whenever she wasn’t too busy to think about it. This would be one of the last times she’d do this with Meg, just hang like this, working together, supporting each other. It was silly to feel this way, idiotic even, but that didn’t change the fact that she couldn’t help it all the same.

Eventually Meg stretched, her t-shirt riding up in a way that Madison couldn’t quite help from tracking, even if no hint of skin actually showed, “Time to break for a meal?” she suggested.

Madison’s stomach rumbled in response. “Um, I guess?” she hazarded. Sophia and Taylor should be fine to look after themselves. If nothing else, there were leftovers in the fridge that they could nuke. She got to her feet and grabbed her coat, then starting putting her laptop and books into her backpack. “Want to go to The Pasta People? My treat, since you’ve been so much help.”

For a moment, Meg looked like she was about to object, but then she just fake-gasped and clutched her chest with one hand. “Ms Clements, are you asking me out on a date?”

Madison rolled her eyes, and tried to ignore the fact that she was fairly sure that she was blushing a little. “Brat.”

Meg looked at her for a moment longer. “Okay, but just this one time and only because I think I might have helped you with your Stats grade,” she said in a more normal voice as she started picking up her own stuff from the table.

“You’re a lifesaver.”

“Sure that your room mates can look after themselves that long?” Meg asked, nudging her with an elbow asthey exited the shop into the chill winter air.

Madison couldn’t help smiling a little that Meg knew her well enough to echo her thoughts that way. “They’re adult women. I’m sure they can look after themselves for a few more hours.”

Meg hummed noncommittally, then said, “Speaking of which, there’ve been suspiciously few complaints abut them from your direction over the past few weeks. Has everything actually been fine, or have you just been too distracted?”

It… it hadn’t been fine, if Madison had to be honest with herself, as much as she’d been trying to tell herself otherwise. Sophia had continued to do random nice things for Taylor — turning up at the apartment with a greasy bacon roll from Taylor’s favourite street vendor, casually walking Taylor to her dad’s place, even somehow refraining from calling Taylor a nerd after she managed to replicate the Frog Chorus with bugs — quietly, without comment, the only way Madison ever found out about them was by chance or from Taylor.

Maybe it was just Sophia re-examining her life, trying to do something different, but that wasn’t what Madison’s gut told her. And there seemed to be increasing tension from Sophia’s side from some source, leaking out into the ferocity of her caping judging by the footage.

Maybe that was nothing, or unconnected, but Madison didn’t quite believe that.

At least Taylor seemed to be settling to the new situation, no longer reacting to Sophia’s random acts of kindness with caution or paranoia. Seemed even to be accepting them, smiling about them a little with Madison, but not in a way… Okay, maybe Taylor’s reaction made Madison’t stomach hurt a little, but in a different way.

“No!” Madison replied after far too long a pause. “Everything’s fine,” she added lamely. “Maybe a little too normal? Not that I’m complaining about that.”

“O-kay,” Meg said. “Fine. Normal. Wouldn’t have expected it from those two, but whatever.”

Meg was so thoughtful. Always paying attention to her, her rambles, always interested in her situation, her friends. Whereas Madison… “How have your family been handling things?” she asked guiltily.

Meg hesitated for a moment before answering. “It’s… not been going well so far,” she said with a kind of false lightness. “A few arguments. A few phone calls unceremoniously cut off. Nothing big, not really.”

Madison reached behind her with one arm and pulled her into a hug. “Hey,” she said. “Hey. It can be big, if you want it to be.”

“I don’t,” Meg said, burying her face a little into the hair on the top of Madison’s head, a sensation that felt better than it really had any right to. “I really, really don’t.”

“And that’s alright too.”

“It’s just that they don’t understand why I want to do this,” she burst out. “Like, I’m taking a major which has got a good chance of getting me a decent paying job, maybe more than all three of my parents put together and maybe that should be enough, but it isn’t. Even if it gets me out of Brockton Bay, it’s still not what I want to do with my life and I… and I… the more math I see at college, the more I want to do more with it.” She took a deep breath and then let it out. “Is that wrong?” she asked in a small voice.

Madison reached up and buried a hand in Meg’s hair, gently rubbing the back her skull. “That sounds like the most right thing I’ve heard,” she said, burying the selfish, small part of her that wanted Meg to stay with her, stay by her side. “And you were saying that you were jealous of me for having my life sorted out. Sounds like you’ve got a pretty good idea of what you want.”

Meg drew her head back just enough that she could stare Madison in the eyes, so close that Madison could feel the warmth of misting breath on her face. “Yeah,” she said softly. “Maybe I do.”

For a moment, Madison felt paralysed, like she could just… But then she drew back, breaking the spell with a nervous laugh. “So, meal,” she said, taking Meg’s arm once again. “Meal. I promised you a meal.”

Meg swallowed, remained silent for a few moments as Madison’s stomach proceeded to tie itself into ever larger knots. Then, just before Madison could burst into an apology for ruining everything, for changing things or not changing things, or just not being enough, not in the way that Meg needed, deserved, Meg sighed. “Yes, Italian,” she said in what was almost a normal voice. “I’m looking forward to it.”

Madison was just about to say something, anything, to return the mood to normal when her phone buzzed. When she looked at it, she could feel her face pale.

Kauket had been hurt, and had been taken to the hospital.


	4. Chapter 4

Madison paced up and down outside Brockton General. She probably should be working, should be revising, should be doing **something** useful. But there didn’t seem much point even trying to start any of that. The last time she’d sat down, she’d been up again in less than a minute, nervous and twitchy and just having to move.

She wasn’t the only person out there of course. Some people like her seemed to be getting some fresh air, but most were doing their best to pollute, puffing away on cigarettes and in one case a pipe.

She checked her phone again. Nothing since Taylor’s last _She’s conscious and complaining_ and _They’re running some more tests_. No news was good news, right? If there was anything obviously wrong, Taylor would know, would tell her.

If there was one thing she could count on, it was that Taylor could keep track of everything, right?

It wasn’t as though Madison hadn’t been here before, of course. When you lived with two capes who went out and beat people up for a living, a little damage every now and again was only to be expected. But it was usually Taylor, the person with an all too mortal frame, prone to all too ordinary injuries. With Sophia, who never seemed to suffer injuries by dint of turning her body to mist… What could have been severe enough to necessitate her being taken to hospital? And what could normal doctors do about any condition serious enough to put her here, with her physiology?

If only Panacea, or whatever she was calling herself these days, was still around. Not that she would have done a check up on a small time hero without any connections, not unless it was an emergency, but… It would have been nice to have the option, just in case.

Her phone buzzed just as she put it away… but it was only Meg, asking how the work emergency was going. Work emergency. She hated lying to Meg like that, but what was she supposed to say? If she’d said one of her room mates was hurt, she knew that Meg would have insisted on coming with her, and then there would’ve been more questions about why Madison was waiting outside rather than going in to see Sophia.

Lies one way, lies another, and no way out that she could see.

A voice dragged her out of her minor spiralling. “Want a cigarette?” It was one of the older men, at least in his thirties with vaguely familiar features, who asked her, smiling awkwardly as he did so. The way he was holding his, stuck out a little from his body as though he didn’t really want it near him, suggested that he wasn’t really enjoying it, and the packet he proffered in her direction was only missing two.

“Um, no thanks,” she said. “Thanks for the offer though.”

“I’m waiting out here while my friend has surgery.” There was an almost imperceptible pause between ‘my’ and ‘friend’, and something about him was really starting to niggle now. “It’s all going to be fine. They said the tumour was benign and it’s just the waiting, but it gets to you, you know?” He looked down at his hands and seemed vaguely surprised to see the cigarette there. “I’m not sure why I’ve even spent the last few hours just lurking around.” She wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince himself or her. She wasn’t sure that he was succeeding in either case.

“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” she said, not sure that she could do anything else.

His eyes glistened and he hugged her, the choking smell of cigarette smoke enfolding her. She froze, unsure of how to react. “Thanks,” he said. “Thanks.” He released her after a long few seconds and there was definite water making its way down his face. “It’s just nice to have someone else who understands.”

And suddenly she did recognise him. She wouldn’t have said she knew him — couldn’t even remember his name off hand — but she’d seen him around the BBQ a few times, helping out. Which didn’t necessarily mean… but it could.

A lot of the queer community in Brockton Bay didn’t exactly trust the hospitals in Brockton Bay, and for fairly good reason. There were always rumours about how if the wrong people at the hospital saw you hugging someone of the same gender — let alone if they found out you were trans — wordwould get out to one of the Empire gangs, and if you had insurance, the hospital had your home address.

And that had been true even before a resident doctor had been caught about five years ago being part of a gang that had targeted gays and lesbians, including at least some that had apparently been too obviously ‘gay’ during hospital visits. She wasn’t sure if it was just bitter shit talk from around the BBQ, but she didn’t know if he’d even gotten more than probation for that, on account of his ‘bright future’ and his ‘service to the community’ and how he’d just been ‘led down the wrong path by bad influences’. She could kind of believe it though, having seen how things tended to shake out since joining up with Sophia and Taylor; especially for richer white people.

So, yeah. Reasons why a lot of people wouldn’t even try to claim to be a couple at Brockton General, no matter the truth. Reasons why he might not want friends that were too obviously family turning up with him.

Not the same as her situation of course, but it wasn’t as though she could be there for Sophia given her total lack of cape-ness. And it certainly wasn’t as though she might well face the same situation if she ever did get into a relationship.

“A friend of mine is undergoing a few tests herself,” she offered up. “It’s probably nothing serious, but…” She shrugged.

He gave her a strained smile. “The waiting gets to you?”

She pressed her lips together briefly. “It really does.” She sighed.

They stood silently, companionably next to each other for a few more minutes.He didn’t take another puff from his cigarette, just let it burn down before he finally stubbed it out on the wall and tossed what remained into a receptacle.

“I wish it was me in there,” he whispered. “Not even for the good reasons. It’s just that… He’d be handling this so much better than me. Is handling it better, really. It just doesn’t seem fair that he feels he has to be strong for me as well as…” He gestured in the air.

Madison reached out and wordlessly wrapped her arms around one of his.

“By the way, the name’s Madison,” she said. “It kind of feels like we’re at that stage of the conversation.”

“Warren,” he said. “Pleased to meet you.” He hesitated. “Want to come in and sit down with me?” he offered. “It might look a bit better if…”

Ah, yes. The power of compulsory heteronormativity. People would be far less likely to assume either one of them was queer if they turned up in the company of the other. Never mind that he was probably almost twice her age, and they had about as much chemistry as two wooden boards.

“Sure,” she said, and was about to follow him in when a cockroach ran over her foot five times in quick succession before scuttling around a corner.

Apparently Taylor wanted to talk. Finally.

“Actually, um, I think I’ll meet you inside in a couple of minutes,” she said. “Just want to get rid of some excess energy first.”

He stopped just shy of going back into the hospital. “Want me to come with?”

She shook her head. “Just want to decompress by myself.”

He nodded. “Sure. Uh, sorry if I came off a bit weird.”

Madison snorted. “Don’t worry about it. I’m used to weirdos.”

He raised a hand. “Take care then, Madison.”

“You too, Warren.”

Madison turned, quickly strode around the corner and then just kept on walking. Taylor would presumably give her a sign when it was safe for them to talk.

The buildings were a confusing snarl; grey-black brick walls to the left and right of her and no windows to be seen, just a few air vents. When she’d gotten a few minutes into the dreary maze, a swarm abruptly gathered in front of her, making her jump a little.

“Madison,” clicked and hummed Taylor’s creepy bug voice.

Ah, there was the sign. Madison resisted the urge to see what bugs made up the current chorus. She’d only regret it.

“How is she?”

“Complaining vociferously, which is probably a good sign. They’re keeping her in overnight, just in case something happens, but barring that she’s probably going to be released tomorrow morning.”

A tight knot that had been buried deep within her body felt like it released explosively. She propped herself up against a wall as the sudden relief left her legs shaky and jelly-like, barely able to hold her own weight. “That’s… that’s good,” she said. Not that she’d really thought anything was seriously wrong, but the not knowing had been almost as bad.Sophia was fine. Sophia was probably fine. “What happened?” she asked when she was able.

There was a sudden ominous hum. “She was showing off,” Taylor said shortly. “Or something. She was supposed to be making Recalescence back off, maybe even take her out and apparently decided that she’d fought them enough that she could focus on to trying to look good and not bother too much about the tinker pointing a gun at her.”

There was a shift in the darkness and then seemingly out of nowhere Taylor was in person as well as in voice. Her body language was hard to figure out, as it often was in costume, but Madison didn’t let that stop her from bursting forward and wrapping her arms around her. Not even the sight of bugs scurrying away from the oncoming impact zone could stop her, though she’d probably regret that later.

“How did you…?” she murmured into curly black hair as Taylor relaxed into her after a few long seconds.

“Defeat them?” Taylor shrugged. “It helped that they got cocky after they knocked Kauket out. Didn’t worry about trap lines. Managed to get one around Recalescence’s neck. After she couldn’t stop my bugs any longer, Ferric” —her voice took on an icy tinge— “had a very, very bad day. Even if he escapes from PRT custody, hopefully it’ll be a long, long time before he thinks about hitting us again.”

“And Recalescence?” Madison couldn’t help asking. There was the vengeful part of her that couldn’t be too sorry about anything that happened to someone who had something to do with Sophia being hit by some kind of tailored tinker effect. But there was also the other part, the part that remembered why Taylor didn’t use neck height trap lines in the normal course of events, let alone ones that were used to render someone unconscious.

Unconscious at the very least.

“Apparently she’ll recover,” Taylor said, not sounding like she cared one way or another.

And it was times like this that Madison remembered that, for all of Sophia’s aggression and bluster, who the scariest member of their team really was. “Good,” she said, letting Taylor go and backing off a step. Just to make sure. “Good.”

“They hurt Kauket,” Taylor said, and there was something tight in her voice, tension radiating throughout her body.

Madison reached forward and took one of Taylor’s hands, cradling it in one of hers. “I know,” she said. “I know. But she’s going to be fine, and then we’re never going to let her forget about this.”

Taylor snorted, and it sounded a little wet behind her mask. “Yeah. I’ve got the bug cam footage with me. There’s not really anything else we can do here tonight. Want to head back to the apartment and see if there’s any really embarrassing photos we can blow up and print for her as a welcome home gift?”

Madison cracked a smile. “That sounds great. There’s just… I met someone in the reception area that I want to say goodbye to, then I’ll be with you.”

* * *

In the end, she didn’t get a chance to look at the footage until the next morning. There was simply too much to be done. Statements to be sent out to the media and the people on CapeFunder, checking with the PRT to make sure that, yes, Recalescence and Ferric were detained and expected to recover, not to mention a quick double check that, yes, their medical insurance was up to date and they had enough easily accessible in the bank account for any kind of reasonable co-pay. Not to mention making sure that Taylor, just as stressed as Madison if not more so, had been properly fed and even managing to head off Taylor’s impulse to deal with everything by going off on a patrol.

After all that, she had just about managed to drag herself to bed and start to think about looking at the text books she should be revising from before sleep up and clubbed her around the head.

Breakfast, thankfully, was a more sedate affair, with a thousand whining texts from Sophia complaining about she was perfectly fine and ready to go kick some ass settling them both down. Sophia would obviously be home soon, and then everything would be back to normal.

Taylor cleaned the plates and then disappeared in the direction of her partition while Madison got down to business. On the video it was hard to see Recalescence’s area of effect; the zone she could make was cold enough that it pretty much shut down any bug that Taylor sent in. Madison winced as the footage showed Recalescence hitting a car hood of one of the local stall owners with her signature crowbar, shattering part of it where she’d weakened it with one of her ice seeds. She really had been trying to pick a fight with local heroes it seemed.

More ice seeds bloomed in the air as Kauket made her presence known — large enough to slow her down if they caught her within their area of effect, not large enough to weaken Recalescence’s zone too much. Going through the footage, Madison could definitely see what Taylor had meant about Sophia not giving this her all. It might have been too dangerous to approach Recalescence without weakening her zone first — though Recalescence had found it equally dangerous in the past to let Sophia be without at least trying to freeze her — but she was fairly sure that Sophia had kept on pushing Recalescence past the point that she could have darted in to remind Recalescence why intruding on their turf was a bad idea. She definitely hadn’t been as concerned as she might have been about Ferric’s rifle, though she had at least made sure to turn to mist every time he’d managed to point it in her direction.

Then there were the little looks she’d kept on casting, smirking a little under her mask each time as she did so. And they weren’t even towards the villains she was harassing — they were off and to the side, somewhere else completely. What had she been looking at? Madison muttered to herself and started sketching out buildings and positions as best as she could figure from the bug cam footage, but it didn’t help. Sophia must have thought it was important, but Madison had no idea what it might have been. She’d just have to ask Sophia when she was discharged.

And then she got to the moment Sophia was hit. A combination of her bad habits throughout this fight. Sophia had briefly come to a halt and made a gesture with her hand a bit like a wave, as if taunting Recalescence to use what remained of her zone to freeze her, but this had also finally allowed Ferric to take a good shot at her. Something had flashed through her mist like form, partially dissipating it… and then she’d coalesced limply on the ground.

Madison could almost imagine the loud angry buzzing that followed.

But… She rewound to the point Sophia had stopped and zoomed in. It was fairly grainy and not the best angle for seeing what she had been doing, but it didn’t quite looked like it had been a wave. She squinted. Had that really been Sophia moving her hand up to her face, or was that just an artefact of the camera position? No, she was fairly sure it was the former. The bottom of her face even.

Holy crap. Sophia had been blowing a kiss.

Madison looked back at her sketch, and… it was certainly possible that Taylor had been in that direction. She hadn’t exactly been keeping tack of herself at that point with any of the bug cams.

But it made sense.

Sophia, wearing down Recalescence’s zone so Taylor could take her out with bugs. Sophia looking in Taylor’s direction, part validation, part flirting. Sophia, blowing a kiss before going in for the coup de grace.

Crap.

Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap.

This was really happening. Madison had hoped… but no. Sophia really had feelings for Taylor, and it had already caused trouble; almost caused tragedy.

This was everything Madison had feared, even worse. Who knew what would happen if they started dating? Or if things went wrong, and they had an argument? Even split up?

No. Nonononononononono.

She was happy with how things were now. She’d just about got everything arranged how she liked, was content with her ability to manage the give and take of the other two. She was able to dampen the worst of Sophia’s excesses, get her to back off when she was a little too intense; able to lighten Taylor up a bit when she got too down, soften her when she got too hard.

She couldn’t manage this if the dynamic changed, couldn’t handle the increased oscillations if the other two were now a pair and she was just a friend, looking on.

Please no, please no, please no.

Sophia had already been hurt flirting. Things would only go downhill from here. She just knew it.

She just couldn’t do this any more. Not with the business and her coursework and her midterms.

Oh god, her midterms.

She wasn’t sure how long she was just staring blankly, panicking, trying to figure out how she was, how she was, how she was… but suddenly something startled her out of her trance.

Movement. Taylor, walking past her.

She glanced back at her laptop screen, but thankfully it was already black, having gone into a power saving mode.

“H-Hey,” she stammered out to Taylor.

“Oh, hi,” Taylor said, not turning in her direction in the way she often didn’t. “Just off to get a delivery that’s about to be made.” She paused and the buzzer went as if it had just been waiting for her to say that. “I thought you were asleep,” she said conversationally as she stepped out the door.

“I had my eyes open,” Madison muttered.

She stood up and stretched, feeling her joints click. She’d… she’d handle the footage later. She’d do something else for the moment, clear her head. Like her stats exam. She could always use some more revision for that.

A bunch of roses entered the apartment, followed by Taylor handling them as though they might explode at any moment. “The package was addressed to me, so I unwrapped them downstairs,” she said a little faintly. “The card said they’re from Sophia?”

Oh.

Oh god.

Oh god, no.

Madison wasn’t in any way prepared for this, not at the moment. Maybe not ever, but definitely not at the moment.

“It’s…” Taylor said, apparently prepared to speak for the both of them. “She had to have sent them last night, right? Like, an apology for scaring us?” She nibbled her lips uncertainly. “I mean, that doesn’t seem quite right — I’m really not sure you’re supposed to use roses for an apology, not unless you’re… but I can’t really think of another reason she might have sent them. I mean, it’s not an anniversary. That first time we worked together isn’t for another another couple of months, the first time we worked together as heroes not until July and the time we officially became a team was back in October, so it can’t be any of those. But… but… there isn’t anything else I could think it would be?” She blinked helplessly at Madison, who just swallowed uselessly at her.

Oh, please no.

“I mean, it was anyone else, if **I** was anyone else, I might think… But, no, I mean, it’s not like Sophia could be interested in this, right,” she said indicating the lines of her body with one hand.

There were times that Madison really hated what Emma had done to Taylor’s body image; what she and Sophia and all the rest had helped with. Could really, really hate herself, which at the moment was far easier than… “You’re perfectly cute,” Madison tried, even if, for all she wished otherwise, she couldn’t really see her as anything other than plain.

“Thanks,” Taylor said, smiling bitterly. “But you’re my friend. I think you have to say that. Let’s be honest, there’s no way that Sophia going to be sending me flowers as anything other than an apology.”

This was the moment Madison could say something. Say that she’d thought Sophia had been interested in her for a while, show her the proof that Sophia had been blowing a kiss to her just as she’d gotten shot. Shore up her body image, even if it meant exploding this situation all over the place.

She couldn’t. She didn’t. And she hated herself all the more as Taylor continued. “Yeah, it’s an apology. Of course it’s an apology,” Taylor said, sounding more certain of herself. She frowned. “What the hell, Sophia?” She addressed the flowers as if they were her roommate. “You can’t just send me flowers if you mess up like that. It doesn’t work like that. Shouldn’t you know that better than any of us with all your so-called professional drilling?” She thrust the flowers down onto the table next to the laptop. “I’m going to… I’m going to go on patrol.” She stormed off in the direction of her partition. “Make sure everyone knows that Little Egypt is still safe, and that anyone who tries anything is going to regret it. And let Sophia know her apology is **not** accepted!” The last past came as a somewhat muffled yell from beyond the partition.

Madison stared at the roses. A petal fell, dislodged by the rough treatment. “Okay,” she said weakly.

Everything would be fine. She couldn’t imagine that Sophia would get more blatant than this, not without using her words. And if Sophia had been willing to use her words — if she was ever willing to use her words — this whole thing would have blown up before now. And maybe her pride would be so stung by Taylor’s rejection of her ‘apology’ that she wouldn’t try again. Sophia would recover. Taylor would recover.

And if Madison discovered new levels of self despite in the process… well, maybe she deserved that too.

Just so long as everything remained the same.


	5. Chapter 5

“Would anyone like some more mashed potato?” Mom asked in a tone of forced cheeriness. “Sophia?”

Across from Madison, Sophia grunted and sullenly shoved a forkful of greens into her mouth and started chewing.

“What, Sophia turning down a second helping of Anissa’s delicious mashed potato. We didn’t think you’d been that badly injured.”

Everyone winced as Dad’s attempt at humour fell utterly flat.

“Sorry, dear,” Mom said, trying to recover gracefully. “Are you feeling better? We were both very worried when we heard the news.”

Usually there was a thin pretence that my parents didn’t know what her daughter and their friends all did for a living, but that went out the window in situations like this. It wasn’t been as though she hadn’t been expecting an invitation to a family dinner in the near future. It wasn’t even as though she might not have welcomed it normally — for all that she found her parents’ taste in food awfully pedestrian, someone else cooking a meal and dealing with the dishes would have been one less thing to worry about, especially with the first of her midterms tomorrow. But just at the moment…

“Okay, fine,” Sophia said. “Give me another helping.”

Mom passed her the mash as well as a look of worry. Sophia took the first and ostentatiously ignored the second.

From beside Madison, Taylor cast Sophia a cautious glance, like she was about to say something. Then her lips thinned in what looked like irritation instead, and she looked towards Mom. “Could I have some more string beans?”

“Sure,” Mom said, doing so. “And what about you, Taylor?”— evidently having given up trying to talk to Sophia— “Is everything right in your world?”

“Sure,” Taylor said toneless. “Everything’s just fine.”

It was just temporary, Madison kept on telling herself. Sure the other two were a bit stiff with each other at the moment, but they’d been through these periods before and survived them. Sooner or later, Sophia would get over Taylor’s rejection of her ‘apology’. And then Taylor’s hackles would stop being raised by Sophia’s attitude.

It wouldn’t last. It wouldn’t.

It was just rough going until then.

“So,” Dad tried again after awkward silence and the rattling of knives and forks against plates had reigned for several minutes. “You’ll never believe what one of the contractors tried at work the other day…” It was long, rambling and not particularly funny, but it managed to ease **something** in the atmosphere, and by the end Taylor had burst out laughing from one particularly egregious dad joke, and even Sophia wasn’t scowling anymore.

“Truly, the woes of middle class life are horrific,” Taylor said dryly.

Dad clutched his heart dramatically.

Sophia met Taylor’s eyes and they shared a mutual smirk briefly at those middle class folks surrounding them, and briefly Madison couldn’t help thinking… But then Sophia’s face fell again and, breaking eye contact, she concentrated on her plate again. Taylor looked frustrated before turning her attention back to Madison.

“So, what’s it like, Madison, having to almost work for a living for once?”

For a moment, Madison had the insane urge to just break down and cry, right there, right in front of everyone, before she managed to force it all down back inside of her. “Ha,” she said, feigning a jocularity she couldn’t quite manage to feel at the moment. “Baby-sitting you two is a full time job, at the very least.”

That apparently roused Sophia enough to glare at her. “If it wasn’t for me and my street experience…” she started.

“Yeah?” Madison and Taylor said, almost in chorus.

Sophia looked back down, the brief spark fading. “Nothing. Whatever.”

Taylor nudged Madison. “For a moment, I thought she was going to say ‘You two wouldn’t even know how to brush your teeth in the morning.” She glanced towards Sophia as she imitated her voice, clearly expecting a reaction of some kind.

Sophia hunched further over her food, and it was Taylor’s turn to have her face fall.

Madison thought about trying to say something that would help, maybe something about how she appreciated Sophia’s drills, how they might well save her life someday… but at the moment she’d probably just mess it up.

Silence returned to the table.

Afterwards, Mom cornered Madison before she had a chance to leave with the others. “Hey, Maddy,” she said, her voice light, but lines around her eyes indicating worry. When Madison didn’t even have the energy to protest the hated nickname, the lines deepened. “Couldn’t help but notice that there was some awkwardness in the air tonight.”

“Maybe,” Madison said. “It’s… nothing.”

Her mother looked at her, saying nothing.

“It’s nothing really? Sophia got her pride hurt when she was knocked out, and Taylor, Taylor thinks that she could have handled the situation better. It’s just one of those disagreements. It’ll be over and forgotten before anyone knows it.” She desperately wished that it didn’t sound like she was trying to convince herself.

Mom hmmed, but let it go. “How is Sophia, though? Honestly, given I think our chance of getting anything out of her is pretty much zero.”

Madison shrugged. “It isn’t as though she shares much with me either, and if she’s mentioned anything to Taylor, she hasn’t shared it. But according to the doctors, everything looks fine. Though, well.” She shrugged again, once more resisting the urge to cry.

It wasn’t something she’d had much bandwidth to be worried about in the last few days, but, well. Ferric had been a tinker, so who knew exactly what that rifle had been designed to do? But there was nothing she could do about it, in any case.

“Oh, Maddy,” Mom sighed, wrapping Madison in her arms, hugging her tight. “You know we’ve always got your back, if you ever need help, right?”

For a moment, Madison stayed tense, but then she relaxed into the pressure. She mumbled something, muffled by fabric and flesh.

“What was that?” Mom asked.

“My name’s Madison, not Maddy,” she said.

She could practically feel her Mom roll her eyes. “Okay, Madison,” she said and kissed her forehead.

Okay, Madison just had to face her midterms, then she could turn her attention towards Sophia and Taylor.

She could fix this. She could still fix it.

* * *

 

“I don’t know…” Meg said as Madison dragged her along the street.

“Come on,” Madison said determinedly. “We just finished mid-terms. You can relax this one night before starting the reading for your courses for next semester.”

“I’m really not convinced,” Meg said. “The stack of books you saw in my room is only half the ones I want to get through before lectures start up again.”

Madison gives her a disbelieving look. “Really?”

“I need to get as much of a head start as I can, because otherwise with my load I’m going to swiftly sink underwater and not be able to make it up for air.”

Madison sneaked a look at her. “You really want this, don’t you?”

Meg smiled wistfully. “Yeah, I really do.”

“Well, here we,” Madison said, stopping in front of The Pasta People. “As promised, if a bit delayed.”

“You know you don’t really have to do this, not now,” Meg said. “I mean, I can pay for my own meal.” She sighed. “You do realise I’m not going to return the favour for probably a couple of months.”

“Noted, oh saviour of my stat grade.” Madison linked her arm through Meg’s. “Now come in. Your meal awaits.”

Meg softened, leaning into Madison so that she could feel Meg’s heat all up the side of her body. “Okay, since you’re insisting,” she murmured.

“And I do,” Madison said, opening the door for her.

“Oh. My. God,” Meg said, seeing the small crowd around a couple of tables waiting for them. She turned to look at Madison. “How did this- I didn’t think anyone here even knew everyone else!”

Madison smirked. “Truly, the ways of the universe are mysterious.”

Meg looked like she about to say something before she was hugged by Stefan. “Well done on leaving us business nerds behind,” he said. “Though I don’t know what we’re going to do without you in the math study sessions.”

Meg was blushing by the time that everyone had congratulated her. “Thank you all,” she said, smiling almost brighter than the sun. “And especially to whoever organised this.”

Various hands pointed at Madison, and then it was her turn to blush. “It was nothing,” she said. “Honestly.”

Meg came around to hug her again, and she closed her eyes and sank into her embrace. There were some times… Well, there was no point wishing for things that couldn’t happen.

The ‘Welcome to being a math geek’ party went off without so much as a hitch. Laughter, stories and gossip floated around the table and for the first time in several weeks, Madison felt like she could relax and just **live** for a few hours.

She really hadn’t realised how much she’d missed this kind of easy, effortless atmosphere.

Best of all, of course, was seeing how Meg positively bloomed, laughing and smiling whilst being surrounded by all her friends and their support. No more tension. No more worry. She looked about as free as Madison felt, just for these few hours.

And for the first time, Madison allowed herself to feel just how beautiful Meg was, with a curious piercing sensation that went right through her.

Beautiful in a way that Madison could never have. Beautiful in a way that it felt Madison could never deserve.

“Hey, Madison,” Meg said, waving gently at her. “You’ve been quiet for a while. You alright?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” Madison said, focusing outwards again. “So, now that you’re leaving us, what’s the most embarrassing tale of math nerdery that you’re willing to share with us?”

“No!” Meg said, laughing. “I’m not going to share that with all of you.”

“Please?” Madison said, giving Meg her best cute-pleading expression, to the general cheering of the rest of the table.

“Oh, no,” Meg said, making a not very serious attempt to look away. “Not the eyes. Anything but the eyes.”

Madison pouted harder.

Meg practically fell off the chair with suppressed giggles, clutching the table with one hand. “Okay, okay,” she wheezed, “I give in.”

“Just what a lady likes to hear,” Madison said primly, then spoiled the effect by unable to help cracking up at Meg’s expression.

“So,” Meg said after her convulsions subsided. “My most math geeky moment. So, I’m guessing you won’t count when I studied some AP books from the year ahead because I was bored in Math class?”

Some boos.

“What about the fact that I kept myself amused when walking the dog by seeing how far I could get calculating the powers of two in my head?”

“That is pretty geeky,” Natalia, one of girls that Madison hadn’t known before observed.

“Okay, but if you want to know what probably the geekiest thing I’ve ever done — well, it’s probably the time I drew a series of comics involving a glamorous European Math Detective named Count Maria, complete with spaces where someone could fill their calculated answers in to help save her and solve her cases,” Meg said, still smiling but blushing slightly.

“Ding! Ding! Ding! I think we have a winner!” Stefan said, to general applause.

After that the evening wound slowly wound down, and people started leaving, either for their rooms or another party.

“Thanks for arranging all that,” Meg said as she wound an arm through Madison’s as they made their way out of the restaurant.

“No problem,” Madison said, feeling far too fluttery in her stomach for such little contact. She gave Meg her best smirk. “So, do you have any copies of the adventures of Count Maria left?”

Meg groaned. “You’re never going to let this go, are you?” she said, her smile belying her words. “Sure. It was something I did originally for my nieces — they were having problems with their math, and my brother said that they were a fan of my internet doodles — but I kept them up after they proved a hit with their friends as well.”

Madison looked up the URL on her phone. “Aw,” she said widening her eyes for effect. “You really are perfect.”

Meg lowered her eyes, blushing. “Stop that, you,” she said, nudging Madison gently.

Looking at like this, Madison couldn’t help but be aware of how much she meant it, though. Meg was gorgeous and kind and smart, and put up with endless amounts of Madison’s crap as she stressed about her room mates, her job and her course.

She was way, way too good for Madison, who couldn’t offer her anything like the level of emotional commitment she deserved, the amount that Meg offered her on a day to day basis. Madison knew her life, knew what it demanded from her, and…

And she just couldn’t do it, couldn’t be as good a girlfriend as Meg deserved.

But for the first time, she allowed herself to feel how much she wanted it.

God, how much did she want that.

And for the first time, she allowed herself to acknowledge that there was a fair chance that Meg like her back, that if math hadn’t intervened, that maybe…

But it didn’t matter, because Meg was who she was, and Madison was who she was.

“Are you alright?” Meg said as they arrived at her dorm, as she turned to face Madison full for the first time since they’d left the restaurant.

“Yes,” Madison said, hugging her firmly. “I”m just going to miss you, is all.”

“Me too,” Meg said, hugging her back just as hard. “It’s just a semester, but… me too.”

* * *

 

“See you in a bit, losers,” Sophia said as she prowled past Taylor and Madison in the common area and out of the apartment.

Taylor followed her with her eyes, before settling down on the couch. “Well, she seems to be feeling better,” she commented as she put the TV and started up an episode of World’s Deadliest Capes, as ever full of garish animations and growly voices that promised they wouldn’t believe what was about to be revealed in the next hour.

“Think beating BlindSight to a pulp helped?” Madison asked. Honestly, normally she’d consider what Sophia had done to be approaching excessive force, but injuring a villainous cape was something that a hero could get away with every now again — it wasn’t as if most of them played particularly nice with the heroes either — and, well, nazi. Madison wouldn’t exactly shed many tears there.

Especially not if it helped dispel what remained of the mood that Sophia had still been lingering under ever since…

But with a lot of sitting through gory action movies, far too many impromptu training sessions and a certain amount of smoothing ruffled feathers by praising how Sophia had handled situations, she had slowly become less moody. Which in turn had meant that Taylor was less tense as well; less likely to summon a cloud of insects when something irritated her. The extra time Madison could spend with her probably helped as well, now that there was no Meg and practically no coursework. It was a breath of fresh air that she’d so desperately needed, even if she still ached at unguarded moments.

She’d been right. It was… Anything changing would have only complicated things all the more.

She’d been right.

Taylor sighed next to her before eating a mouthful of popcorn.

Madison nudged her. “What’s up, Taylor? Sounding kind of glum.”

“Nothing.”

Madison nudged her again.

“Still nothing.”

Nudge. Nudge. Nudgenudgenudgenudge.

“Okay, okay,” Taylor said, rolling her eyes. “It’s just…” She nodded at the television, which was currently detailing the lurid affair between a Hollywood actress and an S-class threat. “Even villains who look like that can find love. Just not me.”

“Oh, Taylor,” Madison said, sliding arm behind her and hugging her tightly. “You’re too young to be so cynical. It’s not like I’ve got anyone either.”

“Yeah, but you’re…” Taylor gestured at her. “You’re going to find someone sooner or later.”

Oh, Meg.

Trying her best to ignore the stabbing pain at the thought, Madison said, “But you’re a fearless hero. Are you honestly telling me that you can’t manage the kind of confidence girls go for?”

Taylor gave her a pitiful look. “But… but I can’t have a swarm of insects to back me up if a date goes bad.”

“Not unless it goes really bad.”

Taylor sighed again. “It’s just… I know it was silly, but it was really nice, just for a moment, when I thought the whole thing with the roses…” She slouched, sinking into the couch. “Don’t ever tell Sophia that I said that.”

At least Madison had that she was fairly sure that Meg liked her, at least a little at one point, even if she never made a move because Madison could obviously never make it work.

Probably.

But at least Madison had the hope that someone could like her like that. Unlike Taylor, who because of Emma, and Sophia and her…

“Sophia was flirting with you,” Madison said before she could stop herself.

Taylor went still beside her. “What,” she said in an emotionless voice.

Crap. Just when Madison had gotten everything sorted out. But she’d already let the cat out of the bag. “I’m fairly sure she did actually mean those roses in a romantic sense. And she got taken out by Ferric because she was trying to blow a kiss to you at the time.”

There was a sudden buzzing in the air, and Taylor moved so that she could stare Madison directly in the face with a flat expression. “Tell me you’re not messing with me,” she said, still in that weirdly level voice she used when she was really upset. “Tell me this isn’t some kind of joke.”

Madison gulped. “No messing. I can show you the footage.”

Taylor maintained eye contact for what seemed like forever. “Okay,” she said.

“Okay?”

“Okay, show me the footage.”

Her stomach twisting and knotting, Madison did so.

“Why didn’t you- Sophia asked you not to, didn’t she?”

No, Taylor being mad at Sophia again was bad. Better that she be mad at Madison. “I- no. It was that period before the midterms. I couldn’t handle-“ Madison became dimly aware that she’d started crying. “I couldn’t handle- I just couldn’t risk everything changing, not when I-“

She buried her face in the side of the couch and gave up her attempts at trying to explain what she’d meant, why she’d done what she’d done

It didn’t matter anyway. Taylor had already left the apartment, and taken her bugs with her.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to Kittius and I'm totally holding you to that Hourglass omake.

Although she’d stopped crying, Madison’s face was still buried in the cushions when she felt the couch shift as someone sat down beside her. She couldn’t quite muster the energy to, well, do much of anything right about now. And it would either be Sophia or Taylor. She honestly wasn’t sure which would be worse at the moment.

A loud sigh after a minute announced that it was, in fact, Sophia. Great. What could she say? How could she apologise, how could she manage…?

Oh, it didn’t matter. Taylor would doubtless be home soon and then…

Whatever would happen would happen.

“Look,” Sophia said. “Are you actually going to make me ask about feelings here?” Her tone was brusque, but there was just enough fondness that…

Madison found herself turning towards her. She undoubtedly looked a state, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to care, not when a smile was somehow reluctantly forcing its way onto her face. “I—” she started, then had to swallow before continuing. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”

Sophia slanted a look at her, turning her head just enough from she had been very determinedly staring at the black screen of the tv. “Good,” she said. “I was beginning to wonder.”

An awkward pause stretched between the two of them and Sophia turned back to look at the blank screen. Madison had just about collected herself enough to consider getting up off the couch and going to fix her face when Sophia, still not looking towards her, said, “So?”

“So?” Madison repeated dumbly.

Sophia rolled her eyes, and as if the words were being forced out of her, said, “So, what’s wrong?”

Madison briefly thought about denying anything was the matter, but, well, if she looked bad enough that Sophia was asking her about her feelings, there probably wasn’t much chance of that working. Instead, she let her eyelids flutter shut again so she couldn’t see Sophia’s expression. “I fucked up.”

“No shit,” Sophia said flatly.

The tone ignited a spark of irritation with her. “You don’t have to sound so unsurprised!”

“Everyone fucks up every now and again. Even me.”

“You don’t have to tell me,” Madison muttered. Which was maybe a little unfair, but she wasn’t feeling very fair right about now.

Another awkward silence descended.

“Are you really going to make me ask a third time?” Sophia sounded as though this was the most painful thing that had ever happened to her, even worse than all the times she’d been almost dispersed in fights, even worse than her recent visit to hospital.

But, okay. Maybe she did want to speak about this, even if talking about the situation had caused the problem in the first place.

“I… may told Taylor that you’re interested in her. Or were, anyway. It isn’t as though we’ve discussed it.”

Beside her, Sophia was utterly still. “You… knew about that?”

“You weren’t that subtle.”

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t really trying to be,” she said defensively. “So, what, Taylor felt shit because she’d actually have to reject me to my face? No need for that, got that message loud and clear.”

“I… I don’t actually know what Taylor thinks of your feelings,” Madison admitted, feeling wretched all over again. “She hadn’t realised that you were flirting with her before I told her.”

“Really?” Sophia said in a single moment of unguarded hope before deliberately slouching back into the couch. “Doesn’t mean that her answer is going to be any different. Don’t see her here, and it isn’t as though she doesn’t know where I am.” She paused for a moment, then stole her first look at Madison since this conversation started. “Don’t see how that leads to you crying into the couch.”

Okay, she could do this. She could do this again. “She didn’t realise because she thought that no one could find her attractive.” Sophia made a face as if she couldn’t believe that. “She thinks that because of us, Sophia. Because of the shit that **we** put her through all those years ago.”

“Shit.”

“The worst thing is—” Madison started to cry again. “The worst thing is that I could have told her that when she got the roses. Could have told her that it wasn’t an apology, that it was you being into her. But I couldn’t! I couldn’t!” She buried her face in her hands. “You were— you’d just gotten injured because you were flirting with her. And what if— Who knows what would have happened if you’d started going out? Or if she’d felt so strongly about it that she quit the team? Or… There were just so many variables, and I couldn’t handle any more.” She became aware that Sophia had very gingerly wrapped an arm around her, handling her as though she might explode… or might break. “Not on top of keeping the business afloat, handling the press, taking midterms, managing you—” She stopped four syllables too late.

“Managing the two of us.” Sophia said emotionlessly. “Yeah, that part’s not a surprise.” She didn’t sound mad which… Which was good.

Even if Madison might have managed to detonate the team all by herself.

“And I just couldn’t do any more. Not then. So I didn’t say anything. Just… let her talk herself into believing what she wanted to. But… but she was still feeling that way about herself today, and I couldn’t… I couldn’t any longer. She doesn’t deserve to feel that way, not because of me.”

“Shit,” Sophia exhaled in a way that very clearly demonstrated she felt just the same way as Madison did about this.

“And I’d hoped…” Madison continued in a very small voice, “That maybe someone around here would have some luck in love.”

The silence from next to her was deafening.

And then…

“Did I hear correctly?” Sophia asked, sounding far too thrilled to be talking about something other than her and Taylor. “Did little Maddy have a girlfriend? How did I never hear about this?”

“Madison,” Madison corrected, unable to help herself, unable to stop a slight smile twitching at the side of her mouth. “And I didn’t, not really. She… Meg deserved someone who could spend more time, more of herself than I had to give, after all…” she waved around at the apartment. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter anyway. She hasn’t got the time now.”

“What do you mean by that? You don’t have time or enough of yourself?”

It was easier, somehow, speaking about this than about Taylor. “Just, most weekdays I have an average of four hours of lectures, spend three hours on coursework and studying, four hours on business related activities, a couple of hours travelling, and three hours looking after you and Taylor,. Which, granted, does include eating. That leaves seven hours of sleep and one whole hour of me time. I catch up on sleep at the weekend, tend to have less travelling and obviously no lectures, but… It’s not enough, Sophia, not when my primary concern has to be you two.”

She felt emptier for having said all that, everything she’d never quite said to the others, everything she’d kept from them because they were **heroes** , they didn’t need anything else to worry about.

“Fuck, Maddy. Why didn’t you say something? I’m sure I could pick up some of that work for you. Maybe do the talking to some of those reporters.”

Madison shuddered at just the thought, despite knowing that Sophia was joking.

Please, let Sophia have been joking.

“Seriously, though,” Sophia continued. “If you’re that overworked, you should have let us know. Let us pick up some of the slack instead of watching tv and playing video games. Taylor’s good at nerd stuff, and I’m sure there’s something I could do.”

“No!” Madison said, her stomach twisting at the very thought, turning around to look at Sophia desperately. “You don’t have to do that!”

Sophia smirked at her. “Don’t worry, little Maddy. We got this.”

And, oh God, it was tempting, but. “It doesn’t matter,” she said. “Meg’s on credit overload this semester. It isn’t as though she has time for anything either.” No time for Madison, at very least.

“Doesn’t have to be big,” Sophia said. “Just let her know that you’re thinking of her, that you care. That’s the kind of shit you’re good at.”

And, well, maybe Madison could think of a few ideas along those lines. “And maybe even use my words?” she couldn’t help adding a little teasingly.

Sophia looked sour. “Yeah, words. Probably not the worst idea.”

And that… that seemed almost reasonable. Almost doable. Almost something that Madison could do. And Meg, oh Meg. “But what about Taylor?” she said weakly.

“If she’s pissed at you, I’ll handle her. Seems like we’ve got a certain amount to discuss. Maybe even… feelings,” she said with disgust.

Madison looked down at the ground. “You’re not angry with me?” she said in a small voice, no longer able to ignore the elephant in the room.

“For not telling her something I wasn’t woman enough to come out and say? Not that much of a bitch. Now go out and see your girl.”

* * *

Meg opened her dorm door, blinking at Madison blearily. “Oh, you,” she said.

“Yes, me,” Madison said, smiling hopefully.

“I didn’t expect to see you here.” Meg looked at her cautiously. “Not that I’m ungrateful or anything, but…”

“Yes, well, I thought you might need something to eat.” Meg brandished her box of boxes at her. “Unless you’ve had something already?”

Meg’s stomach rumbled. “Would you believe me if I said yes?”

“Not really, no. Mind if I come in and feed you?”

Meg peered at the collection of boxes in front of her. “Come right in. If nothing else, I can’t help wondering what you’ve got in there.” She stepped out of the doorway, heading back towards her bed which had textbooks spread to over it.

Madison headed over towards the microwave and put three of the tupperware boxes in to heat. “How’s it going?”

“Realising again how far behind I am.” Meg stretched her arms out above her head so hard Madison could hear the clicking, and then smiled softly. “It’s good though. Do you mind if I finish some of this up while you’re doing that?”

“Go ahead,” Madison said, and silence fell between the two of them. It didn’t feel awkward though — Madison found herself quite content to just watch Meg as she scribbled out numbers, letters and arcane signs over a sheet a paper, with a chewed lip and furrowed brow that Madison really found far too cute for her own good.

Finally, the last of the portions was heated to Madison’s satisfaction and she started spreading them out over the unoccupied portion of Meg’s bed. “Food’s up,” she prompted when Meg showed no signs of stopping.

“Oh, thanks,” Meg said. “It’s really far too easy to get lost.”

“I brought a mix of North Indian dishes, just so you can see what you like.”

“It smells so good. Where did you get this from?”

Madison shrugged, a little self conscious for no good reason. “It was just some stuff I had lying around at home.”

Meg moaned a littleas she put a sliver of Rogan Josh into her mouth. “You made this? I know you’ve said that you liked to cook, but…”

“Guess I’m full of surprises.”

Meg looked at her affectionately. “I never doubted that.”

Madison screwed up her courage. “So, would you like this to be a regular thing? Me showing off my cooking skills, you getting a food on at least a semi-regular basis?”

Meg’s expression turned to one of sympathy. “Oh, Madison. It’s not like I wouldn’t have said yes a few months ago, wouldn’t have loved to say yes, but right now…”

“Right now I’m not asking for anything more,” Madison said hurriedly before Meg could shut her down. “I mean, the situation at home has changed that I might have some more time in the future, but I don’t know, can’t know how that’s going to shake out. But… but… I can do this. I can look after you like this. I want to look after you like this.”

Meg looked conflicted. “I’m not sure that I want you to look after me. That’s always been my job in this… friendship. And, not to put too fine a point on it, but it seems like you have enough people to worry about already.”

Madison made a face. “That’s one of the things that might have changed at home. Sophia is surprisingly in touch with her feelings for someone who hates to display any of them. And, well, she reached out. Worried about me, in her own way. So maybe it doesn’t have to be one thing or another. Maybe we can worry about each other, as much as we’re able. Even if that’s just sharing the occasional meal together.”

Meg looked at her searchingly for a moment, then smiled brilliantly. “Okay. I think I can do that. I think I can convince even my workaholic tendencies that it’d be best to eat every now and again.”

Madison smiled, and as she reached over the table, Meg reached back and took her hand.

When Madison walked back into the apartment, she was still smiling broadly. Then she saw the tops of two very familiar heads over the back of the couch. Not together, but nor a million miles away either.

“Madison,” Taylor said neutrally. Which… at least she was acknowledging her existence.

“Hey, Madison,” Sophia said, then gestured at Taylor, “Look what… what vision of loveliness I’ve got sitting next to me.”

Taylor huddled into the couch a little as Madison walked further into the apartment, angling so she could see them both. “Hah,” Taylor said, blushing slightly. “Vision of loveliness, really? What books have you been reading?”

Sophia loftily ignored that comment, turning instead to Madison. “Promised to keep on reminding her that she’s hot until she believes it.”

Madison looked again at Taylor, and maybe it was the way that she was shy and yet somehow not entirely unhappy about this state of affairs. Or maybe it was just the fact that Madison had held hands with Meg like a fool through most of the meal. Or maybe it just didn’t matter, but it didn’t taste like a lie when she asked, “What, this cutie here?” She hooked a thumb at Taylor who blushed further at the additional attention. “I don’t believe it.”

“Stop it, you two,” moaned Taylor, trying to hide her face with one arm and flailing ineffectually with the other.

“Never,” Sophia told her matter of factly.

Madison’s stomach twinged a little as she screwed up the courage to ask, “So, what’s the situation with you two?”

Sophia poked Taylor in the ribs, who popped her head over her arm. “Nothing. Not at the moment. I still… I need to…” she stammered to a halt.

Sophia rolled her eyes. “We’re going to get her to the point where she feels like the babe she is, see where she wants to go from there. She knows how I feel—”

“Intellectually at least,” Taylor interrupted.

Sophia waited for a good few seconds, then when Taylor didn’t say anything more, she continued, “ **As** I was saying, she knows how I feel, so she’s just got to figure out what she wants.”

“And, don’t worry Madison, whatever happens, we’re not going to leave you behind,” Taylor said softly and it was Madison’s turn to feel all twitchy at being so seen by her room mates.

She cleared her throat. “I did hear Sophia say something about helping me with the business end of things.”

Sophia groaned loudly. “Really? Haven’t I done enough for today?”

Madison was merciless. “If you don’t start today, when will you?”

Taylor coughed and raised a hand. “I can probably do something as well.”

“Raising a hand? Nerd.” Sophia smirked at Taylor, who shot her a playfully irritated look. Sophia just smirked more. “What, you think because I like your butt, I’m not going to give you a hard time anymore? Not going to happen, geek.”

“Definitely getting an idea of the potential downsides of going out with you, ass,” Taylor muttered.

Sophia beamed as though Taylor had just paid her the highest compliment.

Oh god.

“So,” Madison said brightly, fetching her laptop. “Since the both of you have so nicely volunteered for this, so let’s get started!”

* * *

Madison rushed around the apartment, quadruple checking to make sure that everything was in its place and there was nothing incriminating that could be seen, even if someone shuld happen to look into one of the partitions. No costumes, no zip ties, nothing like that. Well, apart from Taylor’s creepy collection of terrariums, but there was nothing to be done there.

Though they could probably just pass that off as Taylor being Taylor if it came to it.

“Are you sure that the rest of your bugs are out of here?” she called out to the miscreant in question.

“Yes, Madison,” Taylor sighed. “I’m also wearing jeans and a t-shirt, have showered and cleaned my glasses. Even have my hair combed and nicely tied back. I’m fine.”

“You’re telling me,” Sophia lazily interjected.

“Sophia’s fine,” Taylor soldiered on.

“I repeat my previous statement.”

Coming back into the common area, Madison could see Taylor rolling her eyes. “Just sit down and relax until she gets here.”

Okay. Okay. That probably wasn’t the worst idea. She sat down the couch and just tried to breathe in, breathe out and concentrate on nothing else.

Someone knocked on the door.

“I’ll get it,” Taylor told her, already walking in that direction as though she’d been expecting just that.

Which of course she had.

“Nah, I’ll do it,” Sophia said, bouncing after Taylor, just fast enough that they both ended up crammed together in front of the door as Taylor opened it.

Dorks, she couldn’t help thinking. Taylor had definitely been a bad influence on Sophia.

“Welcome,” Taylor said at the same time Sophia said, “Wow, definitely see why little Maddy’s crushing on you.”

Madison briefly closed her eyes in embarrassment as Sophia continued, “I mean, you’re definitely the third hottest girl in this place right now.”

“Thanks,” Madison dryly called.

Finally, finally they let in Meg, who was peering curiously around the apartment she’d only heard of, before her eyes met Madison’s, and a smile bloomed on her face that equalled the one Madison could feel on her own.

“Hi,” Madison said, irrationally shy.

“Hi,” Meg echoed.

“The sensible one is Taylor, the human disaster is Sophia. I guess now you get to meet my friends.” She caught sight of Sophia pulling faces behind Meg’s back. “Unfortunately.”

And, they still weren’t going out, none of them were yet going out, but Madison couldn’t help something bright burning inside her chest as Meg said, “I’m looking forward to it.”


End file.
